who I am

 

I wish I saw in myself what other people see. 
I hear what people say, and get glimpses of myself through their eyes.
And inside I think, really? Is that me? Could I possibly be all that?
All I see in me is from the inside. The dark corners, the changes that need to be made, the crooked attitudes hanging on the walls of my heart like picture frames needing to be straightened.

So often we want to know what others see in us. 
We want to know if they see that potential we hope is there. 
But my pastor made a poignant statement at church on the weekend.
That it doesn’t matter what he thinks, or anyone else for that matter. 
The most important thing is what we think of ourselves. 
I can’t wait for someone to come along and tell me if I’m capable.
I need to know that I already am. 
We need a healthy sense of self that no one else can give to us. It is up to us to nurture and cultivate. We need to know who we are. We need to believe that we are purposed. 

Know that you are a good mother, daughter, sister, friend, entrepreneur.
That you were born for such a time as this. 
That you’ve got this.

And what I know of me is this:
That I was created on purpose, for a purpose.
That I’m silly, and sweet and kind and serious.
That I cannot stand eating noises, love people playing with my hair, sleep across the bed diagonally, and have two freckles above the right side of my lip.
I want to write and create more than I want to do anything else.
I need a lot of sleep to be nice. 
I am fiercely loyal, frustratingly shy, and endlessly determined to learn and keep learning.
I can’t think of a better way to spend the day than with endless cups of teas and a good book.
I am great at beginnings, not so good at ending well. 
I love my friends deeply, my little family deeper still.
I am braver than I was yesterday, and not yet as brave as I will be tomorrow.

That’s what I see, and I think that’s all that matters. 

xx

PS If you’re having a hard time knowing who you are… here’s a start

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